Je ne sais pas quoi faire

"Je ne sais pas quoi faire de ces sentiments," He said to me, his accent a weird French meets New York accent. But I was still baffled by its beauty and the way he made it sound like everything he said was just "I love you" in different forms.

Not that I would tell him that I thought like that. Nope, I still hadn't told him I loved him. Like I would admit that! Ha! The very thought of me saying that to him could put the best stand up comedian to shame from the knee-pounding sensation my audience would get.

It's not like Simon had told me he loved me, either. I don't want to hear that from him, though. Why girls dream of love is a bigger question than the big "why were we put on this earth" question. And that's a pretty big question. I mean, love only results in heartbreak and is best if kept repressed in the bottom pits of one's stomach. Like I do.

I stared at him while this whole thought process was going on. Just stared at him blankly, sometimes coming back down to earth and searching his eyes for something I wasn't sure I'd find. Not that I'd know what it looked like in his green eyes.

We were sitting on the couch, no TV, training over with for today, nobody bothering us, although I wished someone would. I needed a distraction from Simon. But a part of me knew I was just lying to myself.

"Do you know what I said?" He asked softly, not breaking eye contact. I shook my head slowly and shaking only a short distance so I could keep my eyes locked in the same place- on him.

"I don't know what to do with these feelings," he said in one soft, breathy, whisper into my face. His breath smelled of the mint tea he had been drinking.

I just registered what he'd said. "Huh?" was my brilliant response, my eyebrows knitting together on my forehead but our eyes still connected.

"I love you Evey," he said. My eyes were distracted by his mouth as he said those words, a faint, hopeful smile on them. I quickly moved my eyes back to his and couldn't make heads or tails of what was going on in his mysterious green eyes that never betrayed him by giving away his emotions.  

"Could you repeat that?" I asked. His smile faltered a little bit but then grew as he repeated the words for me.

His eyes were the same as they had been two minutes ago- smoggy and green. I couldn't tell. I couldn't tell with his eyes that gave away so little of him. I just had to trust him- the scariest thing he had asked me to do yet.

But I just couldn't let him one-up me. "I love you, too." I said and while he smile, closed his eyes, and leaned in for a kiss, I stood up. He fell over on the couch, looking for my lips.  

"And could you just say it in English next time?" I said as I walked out the living room and into the bedroom.

I could hear him jump up off the couch and jog after me.